Writing is AWFUL.

I think a little part of me dies inside each time a teacher mentions the words, "essay" and "write". Writing is definitely one of my biggest weaknesses. I'll never understand how people can be given a writing assignment and start writing things down right away. Personally, I think it's better to think about the task at hand and plan it out before I execute the task. Of course, this leads to me completely over-thinking it and becoming extremely stressed out. This happens to the point where I am not pleased with any of my work and throw all of it away. You're probably reading this right now and thinking to yourself, "So what?" It's a lot worse than I make it sound. I go through a very tedious process when it comes to writing and I usually end up with absolutely nothing to show for it in the end. It's been a problem for the past 3 years in my English classes. It's awful. It once was such a hassle for me that I gave up on writing a college application essay to one of my top choice colleges. That's probably one of the biggest mistakes I have ever made. I'm about to make the same mistake again with Oswego. I've been told that I need to write an autobiographical essay and send it in as soon as possible. I have sat down every night for the past two weeks, hours on end, to write this essay. What do I have to show for it? Two very poorly constructed paragraphs that; one - barely illustrate the type of person I am or what I have done in my life and two - make me seem very uneducated. I've gone to numerous people for help and looked online for examples of such essays, but nothing is what I'm looking for. I need to make my essay stand out from the many other essays, but when I look back on my life, it's the same as everyone else! I honestly don't think that I would be having such a hard time with this if I was given a specific task to write about, but nope! It has to be about me and to be honest, that's not very specific! Anyway, if you're wondering where any of my papers that I've written for school are, you can probably find them in the local landfill. I am my own worst critic when it comes to writing. I will never be an English teacher or a journalist, that's for damn sure.